Why Not Me? By Mindy Kaling

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“I am a nerd who doesn’t understand anything sports-related at all, except Serena Williams’s tennis outfits, which are fierce as hell” (78).

“It’s funny when you say you don’t like someone. I am the kind of person who, if my feelings are unrequited, can completely detach from someone emotionally if I simply put my mind to it. That’s why I’m always saying I would be a great serial murderer” (148).

“I don’t need some uber-rich hedgefunder either…I just want him to love his job; I don’t care how much money he makes. Just as long as it pays enough to give me the option to go back to work part-time if I decide to pursue my hobby professionally, which is photographing cool manicures for Instagram” (156).

“I’d just sit there, sipping my kale juice, quietly judging everyone as they happily ate their lunches. And yes, maybe my mouth was full of saliva and the thought of putting an onion ring onto my tongue was almost sexual, but the point was, I was better than they were. I was juicing” (197).

“Though I am a generally happy person who feels comfortable in my skin, I do beat myself up because I am influenced by a societal pressure to be thin…But my secret is: even though I wish I could be thin, and that I could have the ease of lifestyle that I associate with being thin, I don’t wish for it with all my heart. Because my heart is reserved for way more important things” (202).

“Hard work is such a weird thing. As children and teenagers you are told it’s a really good thing, but for adults it suddenly becomes the worst thing in the world. We do a thing in America, which is to label people ‘workaholics’ and tell them that work is ruining their lives…It’s just that, the truth is, I have never, ever met a highly confident and successful person who is not what a movie would call a ‘workaholic'” (220).

“But it’s not that I think I’m so great. I just don’t hate myself. I do idiotic things all the time and I say crazy stuff I regret, but I don’t let everything traumatize me. And the scary thing I have noticed is that some people feel really uncomfortable around women who don’t hate themselves. So that’s why you need to be a little bit brave” (221).

“People do not get scared when you’re failing. It calms them… But when you’re winning, it makes them feel like they’re losing or, worse yet, that maybe they should’ve tried to do something too, but now it’s too late. And since they didn’t, they want to stop you. You can’t let them” (222).

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